"Unrevealed"

There are times that we are lying, even to ourselves to overcome something that we don't want to EVER happen.

I was just a typical high school girl. They say I"m cute and charming. I had good grades too. I didn't really expect something that I NEVER imagined before. But there was this boy, his name is Riley, who suddenly came into the picture and changed my perspective in
life, or so I thought.







When I was in my second year, we were classmates. And this was the time where it all started. My classmates were always teasing us because they say we look good together. But I'll just answer, "Really? But, I'm sorry to disappoint you because it hasn't come to my mind to think such things." But they'll tell me, "Can't you give him a chance?" I told them angrily, "What chance are you talking about? He's not yet budgering me to ask some things. He's already mature enough so I know he knows what to do."

Since then, they stopped teasing me, but I know that he found out what I said.

When we reached in third year, I know that there was something missing in my life. There was also a time that I became confused about who I was hiding from these ridiculous feelings. But I know this should not be tolerated because I promised to my self that I'll make my parents become proud of me.

One time, while I was alone in the corridor, Riley approached me and said, "Uhm.. Hi Criz! I know this is crazy, but you know, I really want to be your friend. I know that you already know, because some of our classmates are telling you that I like you. Personally, I want to say that I do really like you since the first time I saw you. But I guess you don't really like me --"

I interrupted and said, "It's not that I don't like you. It's just that.. I don't know.."

"Maybe I'll just learn how to wait while you, you know.. realize things."

"Yeah.. I guess that's totally.. ahh.. right. Right?"

"Yes.. I'll see you around then?"

"Okay.."

And Riley bid me goodbye. Well, I went home. And perhaps I realized. I should be true to myself. My friends were also confused about me and my feelings, because I can't tell them.

While I was resting , I heard my cell phone beeping. I guess it's just Belle, or maybe Marie, or maybe Rhian, or Alex.

When I took my cellphone, I didn't recognize who it was because I didn't register the unknown number. And as I read the text, I found out it was from Riley. He texted me, and the message says,

"Hi Criz! Good eve. I'm sorry to disturb you. I can't sleep because I was thinking about what you told me. Oh! Never mind! Sleep well. Good night! ^_^"

And then I texted him back:
"Hello Riley. I'm so sorry, but can we talk tomorrow?"

He replied,
"Really? You want to talk to me? Sure, sure.."

I texted him the place and time where we'll meet.

The following day: Epiphany.

After last night, I thought it's not that bad to open your heart to someone who's willing to enter in it no matter what.

Befire we met I decided to chat with my friends and tell them what I really feel.

"You know what, guys? I think you're right. It drove me crazy, hiding from my true self."

My friend Alex told me, "Criz, it's not bad to fall for someone. You just have to open both mind and heart to accept it."

Marie told me loudly, "It's not our fault that we're as beautiful as a goddess, Criz! It's practically a crime."

And we all laughed about it. My friend Belle added some words too!

"Criz, what are you planning to do now?"

"I told him we will meet today at the library at around 12:30pm."

"What are you waiting for? It's already 12:20. You don't want him to do crazy things, right? Go, girl! Move!"

"Okay, okay! Relax, you're more excited that I am. I gotta go."

I ran through the cafeteria and through the gym to reach the meeting place. When I got there, I could hardly breathe. I settled myself and entered the library. I saw him sitting at the corner. As he saw me, he waved and smiled at me. I smiled and waved back too

"Hi," I nervously greeted him.

"Hi too. So how's it going? Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Uhm.."

We were both speechless as we stared at each other for a moment. He broke the deafening silence between us.

"So, ahh.. What do you want to talk about?"

"I, uhm.. had an epiphany last night. I know that I've been unfair to you for not telling you my feelings. I guess I wasn't ready for it, but I thought, it's not bad to try, isn't it? i mean --"

The librarian told me to minimize my ovice because I was disturbing other students.

I apologized and continued my speech. I knew that he would laugh at me if we weren't at the library because I can feel the heat in my cheeks and I know it's turning red already.

"Criz?" He asked, and his face went red too!

"What? What did I say? Why is your face so red?"

"It's just that,.. Oh, you're blushing, Criz."

"Am I? Oh, crap. Sorry, I can't handle this. I'll go now."

I tried to run, but he caught my hand before I reached the stairs. I told him shyly, "Now you can laugh at me because we're not in the library."

"And why would I do that to you, Criz?"

"Why wouldn't you?"

"Because I can't do that to the girl who I always think about at night. And Criz, I am very happy because you are blushing in front of me."

"I'm blushing because I'm trying to tell you that I like you too, and I'm willing to take the chances with you if you want to. But I guess --"

I talked so fast that I didn't notice that I was crying. And it was too late for me to push him away because he hugged me tightly in his arms and whispered, "Criz, don't fight with yourself. You're just making it complicated. Let your unrevealed feelings go. Don't hide it from the world, and from me, okay?"

"Okay. I wouldn't do that again. It's just so.. ugh. Never mind."

And we both laughed.

By that time, I thought, if I didn't let go of my unrevealed feelings, I won't be this hapy. Totally happy. I hope it's forever.